Trusting Your Own Intuition

“Think of your intuition as your cells’ way of communicating with you. Trust your cells, girl. They know what’s best for you.”

Anyone who knows me personally knows that I have always been a stickler for trusting my own intuition and encouraging others to do the same, especially at the point of my life that I am in right now, (newly college grad) but how do we ever truly know if our “gut” is leading us into the right direction?

I love this blog post by Imani Brammer on Elite Daily, as she went straight to a trustful source: a mindfulness-based psychotherapist named Lena Franklin.

Check it out!

“You know when you feel it in your gut? Like, you just feel it. You don’t really know what you feel, but you feel…it. It’s the “it” that makes your mother call you randomly to make sure you’re OK, because somehow, she just knows. It’s intangible, but it feels oh so palpable. That “it,” my love, is your intuition, or your “gut,” if that’s your jam. Depending on who you are, you might trust that intuition wholeheartedly, or perhaps you don’t listen to it enough. Either way, the question remains: Can you really trust your gut instincts?

Elite Daily spoke with mindfulness-based psychotherapist Lena Franklin, who lends a bit of insight on what that strong gut feeling actually is, and whether or not you can totally trust it.

She explains that, in a society oversaturated with information, for some people, the gut feeling can get a bit muddled among the muck and the mire of everyday life.

“Trusting your gut is easier said than done in a society where we privilege intellect over intuition,” Franklin says.

If you already naturally trust your gut instincts, you likely have a strong sense of self, and you trust your body and your intuitive feelings not to steer you in the wrong directions in life.

But that doesn’t mean you’re any less secure in your sense of self if you don’t currently trust your gut instincts. Maybe you just need to know a little bit more about it.

So what exactly is a gut instinct, and what does it mean to trust it?

According to Franklin, “gut instincts are body-centered, conscious messages fueled by subconscious insights that we’ve been building since birth.”

Gut feelings, though internal, often initially come from some outside influences. You perceive something — someone’s facial expression, their tone of voice, whatever it may be — and though you may not even be aware of your perception, it’s triggering something inside of you.

Needless to say, it’s a bit different from the logical thinking you’re probably used to.

In fact, Franklin explains that when it comes to intuition and logic, those are two very different playing fields. Just because logic is, well, logical, does not make it more trustworthy than intuition.

She tells Elite Daily,

Trusting the gut is a whole different ball game than trusting logic. Gut instincts come from a bottom-upprocess, meaning that these messages stem from the body rather than from cognitive thoughts.

Logic is a top-down process of thought-based information. If we can distinguish where these messages originate from in the body, we can begin to actually trust the powerful wisdom of our guts rather than making impulsive life choices based on top down, fear-based thoughts.

If you’ve never really tapped into these intuitive gut feelings before, don’t fret. There are plenty of ways to start trying.

Franklin suggests meditation as your best bet, as it taps directly into your gut feelings, but in a calm state.

She explains,

Meditation strengthens our self-awareness, so much like doing bicep curls, we’re making our mindfulness muscle stronger.

The result is that, when we’re outside of our meditation practice, we create a habit of tuning into ourselves through awareness of the body, where intuition lives and thrives.

So the next time you are unsure of if you should listen to your gut or your mind, don’t be so quick to rule out that intuition of yours. It actually comes from a physical place in the body: your cells.

Franklin explains that your cells carry memory. They remember experiences that you’ve had throughout your life, and how you felt when you went through those situations — even if your brain can’t actually conjure up the memory.

Think of your intuition as your cells’ way of communicating with you. Trust your cells, girl. They know what’s best for you.”

July 3, 2017July 3, 2017

Life Lessons You Learn After College

I’m so excited for these next few years of my life as this is my time to truly discover my passions, work hard and be free! With that being said, this blog post by Brendan Marshall is a must read!

Mikala Morgan Life After College

When I look back on the last twelve years of my life, they appear in thirds. It’s a simple visual really, since the first four make up my high school years, next four are dedicated to college, and the most previous four years were spent gaining the education that I cannot live without.

Ages 15 to 22 are first and foremost a time for physical growth. Our bodies and minds change rapidly through those formative years, as we are exposed to a wide world of influences in preparation for the next step. Whether your future includes higher education, the Military, professional sports, or even taking time off to travel, these years set a foundation for what is to come.

The highly impressionable young adult mind suddenly taught how to think on a global scale is entirely ready for the real world, right?

The most important education begins after the tassel is turned, with diploma in hand. If formal schooling is practice, the game has begun. As someone who didn’t have a plan coming out of the University of Delaware, I’d like to share some of the things I now understand that recently have become more useful than anything I ever absorbed in the classroom.

As you get older, habits become more difficult to kick.

This idea applies to everything from cigarettes to relationships. Doing something over and over again eventually becomes natural. Your subconscious takes over, and you will have to try much harder to change it if that eventually becomes your intent. The sooner you realize this, the sooner you begin to cultivate the habits that will mold you into the person you wish to become.

Every single person you meet has a story.

As the office hierarchy goes, chances are, the manager with 20 to 25 years of experience is going to have a lot to share. Well, the same goes for the peers you come across socially or otherwise. And the beauty of new interactions is that you never know what people have to offer or what you might have in common. It is important to engage people, asking questions that could shed some light onto why you crossed paths. Chemistry requires a catalyst. After all, everyone’s favorite subject is …themselves.

It’s okay not to have a plan, but remember to network.

There are those who grow up knowing they will one day become a doctor, lawyer or police officer. Likewise, there are others who cannot seem to put the pieces together when it comes to pursuing a career. There is nothing wrong with either direction, but it is important to maintain steady inward and outward communication throughout the process. Opportunities and epiphanies are born from a long string of ideas sewn together over time.

Most great things do not often happen overnight, so when you are searching for the next move, the least you can do is talk to people. It could be Uncle Jim the accountant, or a recruiter from the university-sponsored happy hour – the flow of information will keep the wheels spinning. If you confine yourself to a quiet, inactive box, you will quickly stall your momentum.

Don’t burn bridges.

Our freedom allows us to chase any career that we choose. With that in mind, there are those that fit into our life plan and those that do not. When jumping from place to place and industry to industry, do it professionally and responsibly. Even though you no longer work for a particular company, useful references come at a premium and your paths may cross again one day.

Do your future self a favor and prevent the awkward, uncomfortable situation of facing bridges burnt. We all make mistakes, but foresight is a very valuable skill to hone.

People want to work with problem solvers.

My friend Tim shared this tidbit of knowledge in casual conversation without the slightest idea it would have such a profound impact on my professional life. From entry level to expert, be ready on day one to use that brainpower to help solve issues of all sizes. Volunteer your services to tackle the daily organizational hurdles. Eventually, once confidence and knowledge builds, you may earn the chance to take on bigger challenges. From there, the possibilities are endless. Start with something small and watch it grow.

Taking risks is important, but have a contingency plan.

There will be opportunities to take risks in all avenues of life, but make sure they are somewhat calculated and include a plan in case it does not work out. Strive for success, but plan for the alternative. Valuable items in your life usually require insurance, right? The same concept applies to important intangible decisions.

Everything happens for a reason.

This idea has become seemingly more apparent each year since it became my mantra at age 17. While it bounces somewhere between prophetic and cliché, I find continual motivation to build on successes, dwell only briefly on failures, learn as much as humanly possible, help those in need, always be kind, and wake up each day with a sense of purpose – even if, at this present moment, I’m not quite sure what that is. In the end, the best life lessons are those that cannot fit on a transcript and surprise you in ways you never dreamed possible.

March 15, 2017March 15, 2017

Why You Must Disconnect To Connect

So obsessed with this blog written by Sara Uzer over at Elite Daily! 🙂

“Share Less, Gain More: Why This Generation Should Be More Mysterious”

Reblog from EliteDaily.com by Sara Uzer

As part of the Millennial generation, we often pride ourselves on being perceived as “chill” in relationships. We consistently make it clear that we are content with the lack of labels and keeping things casual.

However, here’s the irony: Although we maintain laidback personas, the way we interact with others can potentially exude a sense of desperation.

As a result, we often prevent ourselves from progressing favorably in relationships. Here are four ways our generation leaves little to the imagination:

1. Our obsession with broadcasting our every move to the world.

The Millennial generation’s obsession with social media is no new concept. Remember how we would get excited about “show and tell” day back in second grade?

This was our shining moment to brag about our latest toys or cool memorabilia. (I distinctly remember bringing in an autograph from soccer player Mia Hamm one year, who was super relevant at the time.)

Today, we still get a similar satisfaction from showing off, except it’s in the form of tweets, Instagrams and Snapchat stories.

This holds especially true for relationships. After all, the whole “#relationshipgoals” phenomenon originally stemmed from couples sharing excessive photos of their “perfect” relationships.

Why should other people really care that you and your boyfriend are on a cruise in the Caribbean? They shouldn’t, really, but many do.

On the demonstrator side of the spectrum, we get satisfaction from showcasing how adorable our relationships are and thrive off our jealous friends’ compliments.

We would never explicitly admit it, but it’s true: Knowing that we are instigating envy in others boosts our own self-esteem.

As observers, we feed on noteworthy events from other people’s lives. Conversely to demonstration’s effect, observing reduces our self-esteem. We can’t help but negatively compare our own lives to theirs, and sometimes we even get irrationally upset about it.

It doesn’t matter that we all know everyone’s lives look 10 times cooler on social media because in that moment, all we can think about is how we want to be sharing a piña coladas with our boyfriends on the beach. (Whether the boyfriends actually exist or not.)

2. Being too aware of each other’s intentions.

The popularity of dating apps allows individuals to meet and initiate potential relationships with a little less effort than through traditional methods.

Of course, the initial interaction between two new people is always forced and often awkward, as it would be on any first date.

We engage in standard small talk because we feel we have to when both parties know that they have one thing in mind.

However, that one thing isn’t necessarily always sex. You could be actually interested in developing a relationship with someone, and that other person may be fully on the same page as you.

Great! Or is it? The problem is, both of you swiping right solidifies the fact that you are fully interested in each other. Where’s the real excitement in that? The point is, when you’re both at least somewhat aware of each other’s intentions, it can take out all the fun.

In defense of instigating potential relationships at bars, which others put down often, at least there you are embracing the unexpected a little bit more.

Plus, when you’re meeting up with a Tinder date, it’s difficult to focus on the ambiguity (and excitement) of whether or not there will be a connection because you’re too worried you might be getting catfished.

3. Oversharing details.

When you go on a date with someone new, there’s no question you’ll dish to your best friends about how it went.

While there’s nothing wrong with discussing your romantic life with others, blabbing details constantly can get you into trouble.

Just because we’re not in high school anymore doesn’t mean rumors and gossip are gone forever. Unfortunately, immature (and evil) people still exist. Others can still twist your words and cause problems that weren’t there in the first place.

Plus, when you ask for advice from others, the feedback can be potentially negative. This can cause you to doubt yourself, or overthink things you shouldn’t.

While ultimately it’s you who knows what you want or how you feel toward someone, it can be easy to get persuaded by others — and that isn’t always a good thing in the long run.

4. Being impatient and giving up entirely too quickly.

How many times have you heard a friend complain he or she, “always goes for the wrong people,” or, “has the worst luck in relationships,” and just really want to find something real?

Maybe you’ve said similar things yourself.

We often we take steps backward by going after people we know are wrong for us.

It’s not necessarily as impossible for us to meet genuine people as we claim. The truth is, we don’t always want to spend time searching.

It’s easier for us to accept that we will be “forever alone” and get cajoled into hooking up with our exes again because we’re lonely. Of course, revisiting bad habits is always a bad idea, and we inevitably feel even worse than before.

It’s a vicious cycle, and it’s more difficult to escape than we’d prefer to admit.

We claim we want something meaningful and then engage in actions that fully contradict our statements.

The bigger problem is this behavior just makes us seem constantly available. We give off the notion that we are ready to accept anything that gets thrown our way, or that we are fully okay with consistently crawling back to people out of convenience.

When we aren’t taken seriously by others, we don’t really have anyone but ourselves to blame.

Maybe instead of focusing on showcasing everything to the world and instilling jealousy in others, we should face our own problems. Once we are honest with ourselves, we can eventually stop engaging in toxic habits.

So, leave more to the imagination. Spend less time sprucing up your dating profile, and more on your actual appearance

. Instead of sharing every detail of your relationship (whether through word of mouth or Instagram posts), take a breather.

Focus on what’s truly important.

You may be surprised by how the element of mystery can finally turn things around to the way you want them to be.

Read more: http://elitedaily.com/life/little-to-the-imagination/1054350/
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