5 Signs That You Are Living In Fear

Fear is something we all deal with in life and a lot of the time, you may not even realize how your life is directly impacted by your own fearful thoughts and actions.mikala-morgan-louisiana

Here are five signs that fear is currently holding you back from fulfilling your life’s purpose:

You find yourself holding back from doing things that you know you should

Now, this might be a given, but just think about it: How many times have YOU kept YOU from doing something that you know deep down you should?

We are all our own worst enemies, and I know for sure that my biggest villain in life has been myself and this is due to fear.

Fear of rejection, fear of judgment, fear of success, fear of failure, fear of imperfection, you name it – I’ve been there, we all have. Once we all realize that we are creating more stress on ourselves than necessary, we can start to let those fears go.

You find yourself living more in vain

Now this one might catch you off-guard, as a lot of people will confuse confidence and contentment with selfishness and vanity.

There’s a difference.

With a world that thrives on showing off our best lives online, a lot of these “successful” people we are spending our lives comparing ourselves too are just as fearful if not more. If you find yourself constantly trying to prove something or living out selfish desires, you are most likely acting out of the fear acceptance. But there’s good news – you don’t have to!

We have become a society that is so focused on raising people to be independent and strong that we forget we were not made to be independent but rather interdependent. We need others, we need love and we need acceptance – it’s even in the Bible!

But how we go about fulfilling these external desires will affect our internal happiness.

Feeling lonely? Volunteer at a nursing home, many of these elders have no family or friends.

Feeling unattractive? Reach out to a person younger than you and mentor them. Self-esteem issues are on the rise in our younger generation.

Feeling depressed or anxious? Reach out and help a homeless veteran or someone in a VA facility. A lot of our veterans suffer from PTSD and anxiety far worse than you could imagine.

Feeling unloved or unworthy? Spend time at your local animal shelter. These animals value every time they spend with volunteers and are sure to put a smile on your face.

Notice a pattern up above? All of these examples bring happiness to your life by taking the time to reach out to bring happiness to someone else.

You find yourself procrastinating

Ahh, procrastination. If you have ever been in any type of classroom you know this word all too well. A lot of times people associate procrastination with laziness and to a certain extent it is, but often times if you look at the deeper root of why you procrastinate – it’s fear.

You don’t think you’re good enough or will do something good enough because you are afraid, so you keep pushing it off. I’m here to tell you from experience running away from your fears does not help nor fix them!

Try to face each task head on and in the moment, it will make all the difference in your life.

You find yourself trying to control too much

This is another major sign of fear! One of the biggest fears we face as humans… is change!

…and if you find yourself trying to control absolutely everything in your life to avoid that, it’s time to let go of your fears and face uncertainty. Change is a part of life and often times we miss out on great experiences because we become stuck in our own ways.

You find yourself settling

Now this a big one for us twenty-somethings, as we see this way too often and again it comes down to the fear of change. Whether it be your job, relationships, education, health, etc. Fear often leads us to settle for where we currently are and what we currently have because we are afraid to venture out to the unknown.

Don’t be afraid. We are only given one life and you never know what can happen in the next minute, let alone the next 10 years. Take charge of your fears and most importantly your life.

– MM

You Are The Company You Keep, Especially In Your 20s

friends-rooftop-cocktails

Your early 20s are beautiful, exciting, sad, fun, scary, adventurous and everything that you would least it expect them to be. And as I continue to live this early adulthood life of mine, the more I appreciate and understand the need for surrounding myself with people that empower me to be a better me.

This applies to friends, relationships, the workplace and more. Most people fail to realize that the old saying “You become who you hangout with” is not only true, but can be death sentence for your dreams if you don’t choose wisely.

Not only does your circle impact how you behave, but also how you think, feel and dream- and this backed by science. 

Stop and ask yourself: What are the 5 closest people to me actually like?

What are their goals? Are they ambitious? Do they constantly looks for ways to improve their lives? Are they positive? Do they complain about simple things? Do they admit their mistakes and improve? Are they open to change if it means for the better?

If things aren’t adding up in your life, it might be time to subtract.

And I mean this in the best possible way. I do believe that some people are in your life for just a season and that’s perfectly ok. 

What most fail to realize is that you naturally pick up the behaviors of others the more you surround yourself with them. Birds of a feather flock together. If you are constantly hanging out with negative, unmotivated people – you will become a negative, unmotivated person.

Align yourself with people who have already achieved the success you want

If you want to grow and achieve certain goals, align yourself with people who have already reached them. Talk to them, listen to them, learn from them. You will be surprised at how much your life can be changed by surrounding yourself with powerful people.

I am blessed to have driven, positive people around me daily that empower me to be a better person each day and I can’t wait to see the successes we bring upon each other in the future. 🙌✨

Training Your Mind

tyrese-morgan

Did you know that you can workout your mind just as you do your body?

Everyone knows that consistent exercise keeps you physically fit, but there isn’t as much of a cultural focus on the importance of training your mind — something I have grown to be very passionate about.

I have always been a fan of listening to motivational messages by speakers and podcasters, especially in the morning since your brain is operating at 10.5 wave cycles per second from the moment you wake up until 20 minutes after.  This means that whatever you are “feeding” your brain within the first 15-20 minutes after you wake up can affect your entire day.

Therefore, by listening to these positive and inspirational messages day after day right when you wake up, you can actually condition your mind to become more focused, motivated and goal-oriented.  How cool is that?

Furthermore, just as the time of day that you listen to these messages are important, the content you are consuming are equally, if not more, significant to changing the way you think. Just as doing 100 pushups incorrectly won’t do you as good as 50 pushups done correctly – quality over quantity.

There is no “trick” to being successful, just as there isn’t a quick fix diet pill that can help you improve your weight, patience and consistency are key.

With that being said, below are some of my favorite motivational speakers to listen to when reprograming my mind for success:

Les Brown

Earl Nightingdale

Gary Vee

Simon Sinek

Do Not Listen With The Intent To Reply – But With The Intent To Understand

I recently  finished reading the book Twenty-Two Letters, recommended and lended to me by a close friend – and boy, was it an eye-opener!

The stories were inspiring, because I often found myself imagining what it would be like if I were in any of the situations described. This led to a deeper mikala-morgan-central-park-nyc-2018understanding – then appreciation for the characters in the book, which reminded me of why listening to others is not just important, but necessary.

Everyone has a story of their own and one of the most valuable life lessons that I have learned so far is the act of simply listening – without the intent of replying but understanding.

Sounds simple, yet the digital-first society that we live in has made the very act of listening seem like a time-consuming and unrealistic task.

However, I think mindfully listening is one of the best skills that anyone can possess.

You will never agree with what everyone has to say – that’s human nature – but by taking the time to hear their side, their story and their reasonings you might just surprise yourself with a more observant mind, better patience and heightened gratitude.


MM

18 Little Things To Start Doing Now If You Want To Be Ahead Of Everyone Else In 10 Years

Mikala Morgan_TwentiesBy: Brianna Wiest, Via: Thought Catalog

1. Be friends with different types of people. Don’t insulate your worldview by only socializing with those who are fundamentally the same as you.

2. Read. Do you know how few people are reading anything other than a few lines of an article here and there? Few. Do you know why it matters? Because a book you read in a few days this week can change the way you think about something for decades to come.

3. Question yourself, and honor your doubt. People who aren’t secure enough to do this stagnate.

4. Be willing to live the way other people won’t, so you can live the way other people can’t.

5. Learn how to cook things you enjoy more than you enjoy ordering out.

6. Learn how to budget your money in a way that makes you feel responsible and liberated, not restricted.

7. Put away a bit of money each month, however much you can afford (and don’t worry if there are setbacks along the way). Compounded interest is no joke.

8. Take on a side gig exclusively for the sake of that savings account. It will be exhausting for a while, but you’ll come out with new skills and the peace of mind that comes from having a fiscal cushion.

9. Get addicted to healthy pain. The kind that comes from clocking in hours of practice or maneuvering through the discomfort of training your mind to focus on one task until it’s complete. The more you channel your pain into something productive, the less you’ll be tempted to ruminate.

10. Get comfortable admitting when you’re wrong. There is no failure in making mistakes. There is failure in making mistakes and having too much pride to fix them.

11. Clean out your space, then work on adopting an attitude of “enough.” Do you really want to spend the next 10 years accumulating things? No, you don’t. Imagine what else all of that money and time and worry could have gone toward.

12. Only put things on your credit card that you will be able to remember in 3 months from now. If you look at how much is due and can’t remember what you spent it on, it was nothing worthwhile.

13. Do your soul-searching. Make lists of what you like and what you dislike; what you value and what you don’t; what you’re skilled at and what you’re not. Start cohering an idea of who you fundamentally are, but allow yourself to be open to that idea changing over time.

14. Reflect on your life, and ask yourself what your single most compelling motive is. Construct your narrative about it carefully – the way you justify your past actions will become your philosophy for future ones.

15. If you commit to nothing else, commit to a daily routine that consists of actions that, over time, will lead you to where you want to be.Mikala Morgan_Blog

16. Do things intentionally. Date intentionally. Work intentionally. Don’t let your life be a series of mindless, random actions that just seemed nice at the time, but are ultimately meaningless.

17. Take yourself as seriously as you want the world to. Behave accordingly.

18. Scrap it all and start over as many times as you need to. There’s no shame in not getting it right, there is, however, a lot of self-loathing that comes from knowing better, but not having the courage to do better. TC mark